unexplainable
by Michiko Kougai
Summary: Ren kept on thinking why Pirika's attitude suddenly changed towards him. She's not hugging him anymore like usual. Ren left to be confused! Please read and review...


Title: Unexplainable

Author: Chi-chan

Pairing: Ren Tao/ Pirika Usui

Fandom: Shaman King

Genre: Romance

Disclaimer: Don't own anything!!!

These past few days I don't know what's wrong with my friendship relationship with Pirika. Usually, everyday when we see each other at the onsen she'll greet me and suddenly hugs me without me permitting her to do it so; even though I sometimes get uncomfortable with it. My sister is the only one who hugs me and then I feel uneasy.

Like today when I was at the Asakura kitchen drinking my milk and she suddenly appeared at the door. It seems that she'll never greet me so I'm the one who greeted her even though it's not likely for a Tao especially me to greet a woman first.

"Hey Pirika, what's up?" I said but instead of greeting me back or shouting profanities at me like she's doing before. But now she even did not look at me nor smiled at me or said hi. She just nodded her head and after getting her self a drink she already went without even saying a word.

Wait. What's happening with me? I'm Ren Tao, the heir of the Tao family but why am I getting so worked out about it? Is it because of the strange attitude of that Ainu girl towards me? If it is the case why am I worrying too much? I should not care about it. I should be thankful that Pirika stopped hugging me every time we see each other. But on the other hand, why do I feel incomplete inside me it's like I miss those caresses that she's giving me. Damn, I hate it when I feel this way. What's happening with me?

So, as I walked out the kitchen that day I saw Pirika sitting near the door somehow thinking something deep. I walked towards her and she didn't seem to greet me again. Damn it, this is the second time that day the she did this to me. What's wrong with her?

"Hey Pirika," I said

"Hey," Well I can take that. That's even better than just nodding her head like she did a while ago. That's it! I can't take this anymore, why is she getting so cold to me these days? Did I do something wrong? Or did I say something bad? If it's about badmouthing about her idiot brother in front of the whole gang, well that's likely she even sometimes join in that sort of thing to play tricks on him, so that can't be the reason. Think Ren, think. What about last week? Did I do something wrong or did I say something bad? Damn, I remember…

We we're walking home from school that day, wonder why we're together? It is because of her stupid brother. He asked me if I can walk Pirika home. Of course I disagree. Pirika's already old enough to go home by her self. She's already fifteen.

**Flashback**

"Why don't you ask Yoh and Anna to fetch her?"

"They can't. They have to go somewhere else." Horohoro replied.

"What about Lyserg don't tell me he also has something to do?

"Well, actually Lyserg and Jeanne have a date. Eventually I cannot argue about true love"

Damn, I'm running out of people here! Got it!

"What about Hao?"

"What! Are you telling me to ask that guy to accompany my sister? Well, yeah I asked and he said he got an appointment to the spa and he cannot cancel that one because the attendant that day got a fine body."

"What! Hao is such a player. He even beat me! Now what about you? Why can't you accompany your own sister?"

"Ahhh, because ahhh…Tamao and I have to go somewhere else. You see it's really a special day for her."

"Which is?"

"Come on Ren; just go home with my sister today."

"Why would I do that, who is she in my life anyways?" I rolled my eyes after that statement. Men, why do I feel guilty?

"Fine, if you don't want I'll tell your sister that you-"

"Alright if you want me to take your sister home, fine. Just don't tell my sister about that thing!"

"Okay, take good care of her alright!" After that her stupid brother rushed thru the door leaving me with my thoughts. I sighed and it seemed that there is no more backing out. I have to go home with his sister.

I'm asking myself lately. Who would reject the offer to walk a goddess home? Even though, Pirika's beautiful and she got a fine body. I sighed again, why am I thinking of her like this? Maybe it's just the work of my hormones. I'm thinking over such dumb things.

So, that's the story why we're together that afternoon. Both of us were silent then she seems to get uncomfortable and decided to break the silence between us.

"Hey Ren, it's unlikely for you to be the one walking me home usually its either my brother or someone else at the onsen, but I never expected it to be you."

"Yeah right, don't push it."

After I said that, she hugged me again like the usual thing. I know it's just a friendly hug but I cannot help to feel my face heating up. There's just something with Pirika that made me feel this way.

"Anyways, what makes you to do this?" She asked innocently.

"Of course this not my will of fetching you and walking you home. You're already old enough to do it yourself. I wouldn't agree with this if your brother did not black mailed me. Besides I did this so that he will not let my sister know about something that I did that would definitely make her kick my ass off." I realized everything I have said. And out of my unconsciousness I blurted it out.

"Oops…" I said nervously.

"So the reason of fetching me and walking me home is that you don't want your sister to know about those 'things' that can make her kick your ass off. And it is just because of the black mail that my brother gave you that's why you're doing this?" She said with quivering voice. But I did not seem to mind her so I continue talking with my usual tone.

"Ahhh…yeah"

She already did not answered back. She became silent which is obviously peculiar.

We are in front of the onsen right now. We entered the door and she seems to rush on her room.

"Mind saying thanks?" I said.

"Yeah thanks" Her voice seems cold and with no feelings. I cannot even think that this girl can be Pirika. She's flamboyant and it's absurd if she became like that.

Damn it, I guess that's really the reason why she's getting cold to me lately.

**End of Flashback**

I have to get from the bottom of this. I have to ask her straightforward what's wrong. If she answered me well maybe I can already say what I'm keeping inside me for about two years now.

"Hey Pirika," I repeated again but this time it is a little louder.

"Oh hi," That's all she replied.

"What's wrong?" I asked trying to be innocent that I don't know what's wrong with her. I just want her to let me know about it. I want to hear it straight from her mouth.

"Nothing,"

"Tell me; are you mad at me or something?"

"No,"

"Pirika, why are avoiding me lately. I want to know. You seem different. You're not hugging me anymore. I mean not that I want to. It just really bothered me." I replied.

Now my words that I have spoken aren't a joke. I'm really concerned. Maybe it is the right time that even to myself I admit that I really love this girl in front of me. That I am just too scared to show my affections for her to the whole group, scared that they will laugh at me, scared that when she even find out what I felt for her that she will never return the feelings back, scared of being rejected, scared of being unnoticed by her, scared of losing her.

"You know what Ren, I just don't understand you. Sometimes you're too kind to me that I'm starting to realize that I'm starting to like you and then there are the times that you're in your super ego-hyper mood and I will realize that how would I like this jerk who has a very large ego. I hate it when you're playing with my feelings without you even noticing it. Like what you did to me last week. I thought that you really wanted to fetch me and walk me home, and then I just found out that you're just doing it because of my brother's black mail."

I noticed that her eyes were starting to flood with tears. I don't exactly know how to handle this kind of situation. I sighed and I just can take that I am the reason to cause the tears from her eyes.

"Pirika," I whispered it into her ear as I pulled her to an embrace than made her stiffened for a bit. Then she suddenly relaxed a bit. I saw a tinge of red on her face that made me blush as well. I didn't let her go for a while.

"I really don't know now if you're really hugging me because you wanted to not because you have to" I heard her say in a whisper but I heard it anyways.

"Pirika," I paused for a while trying to find the right words that I am about to say to her. "I really didn't mean to hurt you. I'm trying to pretend because I don't want them to notice, I'm scared to show my affections for you, scared that they will laugh at me if the whole group ever finds out, scared that if you know what I felt for you, you will not return them back, scared of being rejected, scared of losing you. I really got scared when you suddenly stopped hugging me, I tried to pretend again that I'm irritated but inside me, I was really jumping with joy that I can't even control the beating of my heart. Now, I have explained everything. I just want to let you know that I- I love you very much."

"Ren,"

"Pirika, believe me."

I cupped her chin with my hand to make her look at me. She was still in my arms. I want to let her know how serious I am in doing this. I placed my lips on top of hers; I put all my suppressed feelings in that kiss. I deepened the kiss more and tried to say all the things I wanted with the kiss. I just hoped that she got the message that how much I love her then I pulled away.

"Ren,"

"I'm sorry Pirika." I stood up and let her go off my arms. I started walking away knowing that I should not expect her to return my feelings back.

"Ren wait. I have to tell you something." I heard her and I stopped, but I did not look at her. "Ren, now I understood. I got it and Ren I just want you to know how much I love you as well." I can feel that she's walking towards me and she suddenly hugged me from behind.

The hug that I received that time was completely different from the hugs that she's giving me before. This hug that I have received a moment ago was full of affection and compassion. The hug that no one can ever give except her, a hug that will forever stay in my senses, a hug that will last my whole eternity and only given by the person who changed my life, who gave me the strangest, unexplainable feeling that I felt for the first time, Pirika I love you so much.

-owari-


End file.
